Sunday 15 July 2007

JUST BECAUSE YOU DO MUSIC, IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU'RE SPECIAL

...just because you're an "artist", it does not make you precious

I am taking particular issue with 'jazzual', jazz-funk types here, at this point in time. Jello Biafra had it right in "Holiday In Cambodia" - 'play ethnicky jazz to parade your snazz/on your five-grand stereo/bragging that you know how the niggers feel the cold/and the slums' got so much soul". When booked to play records at a city centre bar on a Saturday night, try some party tunes, not arduous fusion plod and funk covers of Pink Floyd songs that go on for 8 minutes. And try smiling. And try not to have such disdain for those less "homegrown" than you. The city in which I live is full of humourless cool-chasing wannabes. Why do people feel such a need to belong to some kind of exclusive group, even when they are well into their genuine 'adult' years? I don't care how 'cool' you are, you won't feel so cool when you're being chased down a Ugandan back alley by bloodthirsty machete-wielding bandits. Let's see how much of an air of practised, glowering hipster disdain you can give off when the runny excrement of pure terror is trickling down your leg, and the glistening blade of truth is pressing hungrily at your thorax...

No comments: